By: Mr. Slide
“Enjoy your time as a new family!”
Nowadays adopting a dog is a lot like landing a job. There are background checks, personality tests, miles of red tape, and several rounds of interviews designed to assess compatibility. That’s why I was surprised to hear an adoption specialist proclaim these words to a South Boston couple as they took home Mammoth, a three-year-old rescued pit bull, to their studio apartment.
Just the same, a lot of times people pack too much stuff in their lunchboxes. They arrive at the cafeteria — eat what they packed — and discover that they aren’t as efficient in the afternoon. The “food-coma,” as it is jokingly referred to, is a serious determent to work. In order to perform with maximum precision one’s lunchbox must be packed correctly.
Obviously, people understand this. Overeating leads to exhaustion and big, powerful, dogs do not do well in small studios. Both of these scenarios make clear sense to you, but they completely flew over the heads of the folks at BMW.
BMW’s M performance cars have been around for about 40-years. In that time they have developed a reputation for being unhinged track (and street) weapons. Recently, however, people have complained that this reputation has become diluted. The M3 in particular has been criticized for being too big, and too cumbersome. This is a problem for the group it’s name suggests it was designed for — E36 M3 lovers. That’s why, two years ago, automotive journalists went nuts when the BMW M2 was released in the US.
Its compact/lightweight build combined with 365hp at 6,500rpm made it an excellent car. BMW purists loved how ‘tossable[1]’ the vehicle was around track corners and how manageable it was on the highway. The M2 was a return to glory for the M department and, honestly, remains to this day as one of my favorite cars.
All was well with the M2 as it received minor upgrades in 2017/2018 and it still remains a class leader. It’s two-door design, rear-wheel drive, and manual transmission places it above strong competition from the Audi RS 3 and the Mercedes-AMG CLA 45. In 2019, however, this seemingly perfect car is getting a major rebrand. Its lunchbox is getting stuffed.
The M2 Competition Series (M2 CS) is set to hit dealerships this fall at about $60,000 and with the main options package, $65,000. This is a serious price boost from the 2018 M2, which sits at about $53,000 and hits $57,000 once it’s jazzed up. Of course, 40hp, 63 lb-ft of torque, and other adjustments will be made. But I wonder — is it too much?
BMW might have over-stepped here plugging in that much power. Much like how a pit bull might be too much for a studio leaser, 405 ponies may be too much for a commuter. M vehicles already have a bad reputation for attracting pedal thumpers. Will this much horsepower torture folks? I don’t think so. With the right experience people can learn how to handle their performance cars. So the added power is not my issue with the M2 CS. I just worry that with this added juice, it may drive…differently.
Everybody has their favorite family recipes and when they’re altered people get upset. Families get torn apart, grandmothers turn red with anger, and generations are robbed of flavor. It’s nightmarish. That tuna casserole in my lunchbox may not be a large-lux meal but it’s perfect. It fits just right; please don’t jazz it up.
Thankfully, auto reviewers would tell me to relax. Just how a little bit of Tabasco on my casserole might make it a better lunch, a few more bhp makes the M2 a better car. It still looks great, its athletic stance makes it incredibly balanced, the well-timed steering makes it tossable, and now it has even more power. If there was anybody still out there questioning the original M2, the CS has certainly converted him or her — and that’s saying a lot for BMW’s cheapest M vehicle, especially from its biggest fan.
[1] Tossable (adj.) Able to be tossed, particularly around corners at high speed: Tony’s Honda Fit and its aftermarket drift-kit serves no purpose; but it is very tossable!
The Powerslide 